The Brave Podcast

How to Stand Strong in the Midst of Struggles with Elizabeth Meyers

January 27, 2021 Alexis Newlin Season 2 Episode 52
How to Stand Strong in the Midst of Struggles with Elizabeth Meyers
The Brave Podcast
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The Brave Podcast
How to Stand Strong in the Midst of Struggles with Elizabeth Meyers
Jan 27, 2021 Season 2 Episode 52
Alexis Newlin

In this episode of The Brave Podcast, we get to hang out with Elizabeth Meyers.  Elizabeth shares about the death of her son, which caused her faith   and reality to collide. This left her broken, discouraged, and doubting everything she thought she knew about God.  She openly shares about her struggle with anxiety and depression. Going through and growing from that painful experience gave  her a  burden  to reach out to other struggling sojourners like herself and offer them encouragement, support and, most of all, hope.
 Elizabeth is a Christian author, blogger, speaker and podcaster. She is a mom to eight kiddos, airforce wife and army veteran.

In this episode, we discuss:

  • Loss
  • Faith
  • Depression
  • Spiritual Warfare
  • Trust

Follow the Brave  Podcast

Learn more about Elizabeth and check out her latest book!

Let's shop!

The Drifted Drum has apparel, gifts, and decor that are faith inspired and hand crafted by local artists in Tennessee.  See something you like?   Use the code "Brave" at checkout to receive 10% off your purchase.
Share a positive message with the clothing you wear;check out AlwaysHumble Apparel!  This Fresno based apparel company has the goal to motive and inspire others. 

Do you LOVE bagels? Coffee? Just plain joy?

  • Guys, one of my new favorite spots to visit is Clingans Junction. It's a quaint little coffee shop in Squaw Valley that is on the way to Kings Canyon National Park. If you're a Fresno local or you ever visit this area, you gotta stop here. Yummy homemade pastries and delish coffee await you.  

Wanna learn more about me? Check out my website! 

Support the Show.

Show Notes Transcript

In this episode of The Brave Podcast, we get to hang out with Elizabeth Meyers.  Elizabeth shares about the death of her son, which caused her faith   and reality to collide. This left her broken, discouraged, and doubting everything she thought she knew about God.  She openly shares about her struggle with anxiety and depression. Going through and growing from that painful experience gave  her a  burden  to reach out to other struggling sojourners like herself and offer them encouragement, support and, most of all, hope.
 Elizabeth is a Christian author, blogger, speaker and podcaster. She is a mom to eight kiddos, airforce wife and army veteran.

In this episode, we discuss:

  • Loss
  • Faith
  • Depression
  • Spiritual Warfare
  • Trust

Follow the Brave  Podcast

Learn more about Elizabeth and check out her latest book!

Let's shop!

The Drifted Drum has apparel, gifts, and decor that are faith inspired and hand crafted by local artists in Tennessee.  See something you like?   Use the code "Brave" at checkout to receive 10% off your purchase.
Share a positive message with the clothing you wear;check out AlwaysHumble Apparel!  This Fresno based apparel company has the goal to motive and inspire others. 

Do you LOVE bagels? Coffee? Just plain joy?

  • Guys, one of my new favorite spots to visit is Clingans Junction. It's a quaint little coffee shop in Squaw Valley that is on the way to Kings Canyon National Park. If you're a Fresno local or you ever visit this area, you gotta stop here. Yummy homemade pastries and delish coffee await you.  

Wanna learn more about me? Check out my website! 

Support the Show.

Elizabeth Myers

[00:00:00] Alexis Newlin: [00:00:00] Hey guys, welcome to another episode of the brave podcast. Happy January.  So we've made it far through our first month. Of 2021. How has it been going with you guys? Has it been difficult? Has it been a great month? Are any of you guys resolution setters? 

I am not a resolution setter. . I do have goals that I have for myself, usually my goals, Revolve around where I want to travel because . I love travel. And  I'm a bunny trail a little bit going off of that. Aye. Realized maybe a week or so ago that for me, Traveling and seeing the world and what God has created is a form of worship. I just did not realize that it could be that like my friend I were talking and she brought that up and I'm like, Oh my gosh, that's why I love to do this so much because it's so cool to see all the places and all the cool thing  god  created. So. This [00:01:00] constant urge in me to travel and see , everything makes so much more sense now.  I'm like, where can I go next? What other part  can I explore now? And so my travel plans for this year and I'm holding them loosely, but really hoping I get to do it is going to Mexico. I plan on going to Mexico, I think in may ish. 

I've been living a little bit of research in seeing that. The rainy season kind of starts in may, but kind of picks up really June, July, and August. So I want to avoid that as much as I can and will be able to enjoy a lot of sunshine. And explore. So I'm hoping to go to the Yucatan peninsula. In may and I'm bring your friend along and I'm super excited. So that is my goal for this year is I get to travel somewhere. And so I'm really, really, really, really excited. That is my I'm just thinking about it. I just get so excited. So. 

I'll keep you guys in the loop. If that actually happens. When I booked the tickets, as we get to actually get on the plane and fly there, I just cannot wait. So that is my goal. So what are your guys' goals for this [00:02:00] year? What are you guys planning on doing? What aspirations, what dreams do you guys have for 2021? I want to hear them. 

All right, so let's get onto today's guest. Today's guest is Elizabeth Meyer. Elizabeth is a mom of eight, eight kiddos. And she and her husband at this time of this interview, I think they're in North Carolina. They may be in Texas now, but she is a blogger. She's a speaker, she's her own podcast. And she talks a lot about mental health.  Christianity. She talks about  losing a child and how that kind of set her on her journey to really  find her faith. And how that played in dealing with this debilitating depression from that, and dealing with grief . It's a great interview. I had so much fun talking to her. She is also now an author. And so I'm going to put her books that she has available in the show notes. You're going to be really encouraged and really love. Elizabeth interview. So without further ado, here is my podcast interview with Elizabeth Myers. [00:03:00]  

So this is the brave podcast. I'm your host, Alexis Newland. And today I have Elizabeth Meyers on with us. So introduce yourself, tell them why  you're amazing. And we'll go from there. 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:03:11] Yeah. Thank you for having me on your show today. Fun I've been looking forward to this. I was listening to your podcast while I was working out on the elliptical.

So was keeping me motivated. I like the inspiring stories, but I'm married to a fighter pilot. So he's in the air force and we move around a lot and we have eight kids. We have four boys and four girls, two of them are, are grown and out of the house. So I say, we make a lot of noise. We move a lot. We eat a lot, you know, we're messy people.

So my original blog that I wrote was, Blessed Beyond the Mess and it was, life is messy. God is good. That's the message that I started out with eight 

Alexis Newlin: [00:03:49] Eight children? Wow. Are they all yours or  are some adopted? 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:03:54] Yeah, there are. No twins. They're all biological, all just me and my husband. Oh, [00:04:00] that's about every two years. Ish.

Alexis Newlin: [00:04:02] How old is the oldest one? 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:04:04] Our oldest is 22. He's in the Marines and he's married. And so we have a wonderful daughter-in-law that fits right in with our family. She looks like she could be one of our biological children.  and she has my same name. Oh, it looks, that's kind of fun. A little bit confusing,

but it's kinda cool. And then our youngest is eight, but he thinks he's 18. So 

Alexis Newlin: [00:04:24] HOw are your kids coping with all the things with COVID right now?  

Elizabeth Myers: [00:04:27] So, you know, it's funny, we're homeschool family. Okay. When the quarantine stuff all happened, I realized I'm like, we already. School at home. We already eat at home.

We don't eat out much because with that many people it's hard to do. And I already dye my own roots. So I'm kind of like I've already been in quarantine, like I'm good. And  I'm a really strong introvert, so I don't need a lot of extra social interaction. You know what I mean? Yeah. So it was actually kind of nice to have that space in my calendar.

Cause we've been. Pretty busy, but so [00:05:00] yeah, it hasn't been a huge adjustment for them really. Okay. You know, the end of the school year kind of fell off the cliff. Like everybody else's because we do have a group that we meet with once a week. , we just never went back.  The older kids did some things on zoom, which was fun because my daughter in junior high had a mock trial and they had to do that virtually.

Alexis Newlin: [00:05:22] That would be interesting. Yeah. So, wow. Okay. And so you're an author and a speaker. What got you into speaking and writing? 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:05:33] So I'm a writer originally. That's kind of how I got started, but I've realized that even though I'm a writer, not everybody is a reader. And to share my message with more people, I'm trying to branch out into more ways of communicating it.

So that's speaking, you know, doing videos online or through social media. And I just recently started my own podcast.

Alexis Newlin: [00:05:57] Oh how exciting!

Elizabeth Myers: [00:05:58] It's one of those little [00:06:00] things where you just feel like God's saying, go do this. And so I just kind of jumped in without really knowing what I'm doing. So that's been fun, but it was really a experience that I had several years ago. We lost our sixth child during pregnancy, like in the second trimester.

And it was just a really traumatic event for me, even just the way it happened. He was suddenly still born while we were on vacation. , I held a little body in the palm of my hand, just so sweet and so perfect looking, but you know, just way, too small. And , I really had a hard time with that in a lot of ways.

And I struggled with depression and I struggled with anxiety. I struggled with what does a Christian do when you have mental health issues? Yeah.  I got stuck in a place of grief and it kind of eroded my relationship with God. I really started to kind of question the things that I had believed.

And I was kind of like I had had this sort of. I call it a fair-weather faith where I thought, Oh, if I, you know, keep all the rules. If I do the dues [00:07:00] and I avoid the don'ts, then life's going to go well. , I kind of hung on to all these promises. Like, God's gonna take care of me if I color in the lines.

And so when I felt like I was obeying God and I was doing what he asks  and then this tragedy strikes,  I just had all kinds of problems that came out because of that. I was just like where's God in the midst of my suffering?  He just felt very silent, very distant to me. So it was as I was coming out of that, and there's a whole story there too, but part of that journey was I started really focusing on my quiet times in the morning with the Lord and journaling.

 I was about three quarters of the way through my first notebook and I'm like, I think this could be a book.  I've really felt like God kind of just whispered to me,. "Don't hoard it". You know, I feel like God gives us blessings. Not only to bless us, but also so that we can share those and be a blessing to others.

, I would prefer to kind of just be in the background and be quiet. That's kind of my personality. [00:08:00] Yeah. But  I've been very compelled and motivated by realizing that there are other people out there going through stuff and suffering and struggling, especially this year.

You know, nobody is exempt ever. And so, there's just this drive and passion in me  to talk to people and share about the hope that there is in Christ, even when life is going sideways and things are flying off the rails. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:08:24] I love it. So as an Introvert, because I'm also a fellow introvert,and it's so funny, I kind of have a similar story.

 I write, I'm a writer, that's my baseline. And then the Lord's like, you should go into podcasting. And I'm like, no, I don't like being on camera or  a microphone in front of my face. And I was like, well, you should do it anyway. So it's been wonderful. And so speaking, I, Oh my gosh, like  hearing that, I just get a little anxious.

So as an introvert, how do you get over talking to a big crowd of people. 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:08:51] Yeah. So it's kind of funny. I grew up actually as a dancer. So like being on stage with something prepared is really not that [00:09:00] intimidating to me. I would rather like be on stage and talking to a whole bunch of people with things, I have prepared to say than even just doing like a casual one-on-one even like we're doing now. I get more nervous about that. Cause  I'm on the spot. And sometimes I need to think through what I'm going to say, you know, introverts, like to think before we say yes, which is very advantageous and I wish more people did that.

However you know, sometimes I'm like, I don't think of the right thing to say until two days later. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:09:25] Yes. I totally relate to that. Yeah. 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:09:28] So sometimes those smaller conversations are actually more intimidating to me personally, but I think that's just because of the history.  I was on stage when I was five or whatever.

And so I just kind of learned some of those audience techniques as a little kid. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:09:43] Wow. That is really cool. So I wanted to go back to being a Christian and dealing with mental health.  How did you start navigating? Because that's something that has hit our community with COVID and just in general, , Yeah, anxiety and depression has been on the rise.

So how do you [00:10:00] deal with those things, but also know that you have your faith? And you hear from some like faith circles, like, well, if you're a depressed and anxious maybe you're lacking your faith in God. But sometimes it honestly is just chemical imbalance. , how do you balance all of that?

Elizabeth Myers: [00:10:13] Yeah, that was hard. And that was kind of what kept me stuck for too long, honestly. I didn't really have a healthy outlet for the grief I was experiencing. Unfortunately, our culture doesn't really know how to grieve a child that was never born. And, you know, being in the military, we move around a lot.

 So the people who I was with in that time were strangers to me. We had just moved and they didn't know that I was pregnant or had just lost a child.  So it just made things really awkward. But  I kind of lived under this myth of prayer alone should be enough. And Christians are supposed to be joyful and full of peace.

And here I am depressed and anxious, you know, what does that say about me as a Christian? And I've heard so many sermons where they say a pill won't fix anything. And it's [00:11:00] like, well, that's true, but... so I finally got to the place where I'm basically, I got sick and tired of being sick and tired, and I decided that the pain of staying the way I was, was greater than the pain of changing. Yeah. But I couldn't tell like what the root cause of my issue was. So I just decided I'm going to attack it on all four fronts. That's my military background. I used to be active duty too, but then I got promoted to motherhood.

So spiritually, physically, mentally, and emotionally.  So spiritually, first thing I did was I went to my pastor and his wife and I said, Hey, I'm struggling. And I'm struggling with my faith. I'm struggling with depression. And that was a really big step for me to admit that to somebody.

Because, you know,  part of, it's just pride  and part of it's this stigma that we have with mental health. And then  you throw in,  the whole Christian part of it and going to the pastor. And anyway, they were so gracious to me and,  she just wrapped her arms around me.

She prayed with me and she told me about some [00:12:00] difficulties that she had gone through,  that she understands .  I got some counseling help from a Christian counselor who was trained in that. I think it's, it's good to have, biblically trained people help you, but not all pastors, probably not  most pastors even are really trained in  professional counseling.  they kind of have a pastoral counseling. So I think there is an advantage to that. And then I also worked with my doctor who had delivered my most recent baby and she helped me get on an antidepressant that was safe for a breastfeeding mother.

And that is true. A pill doesn't fix everything, but it gave me just enough boost to get me up to an area where I could function, where I could do all the other things. 'cause  I was just running on empty basically. It's like if somebody was in the ICU, say in a car accident or something, you said, Oh, you'd feel a lot better if you would just get up and walk around.

It's like, well, yeah, but you know, I can't get out of bed with a broken right. That's where I was emotionally. [00:13:00] But being on the medication just helped me get up to where I could do the other things.  Where I could take better self care . As a mother of eight kids and you know, all these other things I was doing, I had always put myself on the back burner and you can't. You can only do that for so long and then you break.

And so I learned that I have to prioritize myself sometimes and that's not shellfish. , if I want to take care of other people, if I want to serve God in the way that he's called me to, I've got to take care of me. And that was kinda hard at first, but I'm learning to be better about. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:13:32] Yeah. And it's hard because especially also as a woman and a mom,  to be able to take care of you. Because you're so used to  caring for others and what are other people's needs.

 But if you don't take care of yourself, . Someone told me, , you can't give out of an empty cistern and you can't give water. If your cistern is empty and you have to fill yourself up. And then my pastor also told me, you give from the overflow.  you give from the excess that you have.

So if you have nothing, you can give that thing.

Elizabeth Myers: [00:13:56] Right? Exactly. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:13:58] Yeah. And you can make it really hard.  Did this [00:14:00] affect you being a mom at all, parenting with this going on? 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:14:03] Yes. Especially early on. It was really, really hard because like a week after I lost my son, I had really bad hemorrhaging. I had to have surgery and they didn't give me a blood transfusion, but I was like really close.

So I was very anemic for several months. I was exhausted. And so I was really in this catch 22, because I felt like in order to help heal my body, I really needed to rest and take it easy.  I took a hard hit physically from the whole thing.  But in order to kind of heal and move on emotionally and mentally, I really needed to get out of bed and start doing normal things again.

there was this constant tension between those two. so this is silly, but the compromise I made with myself , it was during the summer, this happened at the end of may. So I sat on the computer for a good bit of the summer ordering homeschool books, thinking, Oh, I'll do this in the fall.

Yeah. I ordered like twice as many homeschool books as I needed that year. And then of course, the next year I [00:15:00] felt all bad and beat myself up that I couldn't get to all these grandiose plans that I had made, but that was a combination of thinking about something else, you know, in serving my kids, but it was low physical energy because I'm just sitting at the computer clicking.

So, , not ideal, but that's what I could manage at the time. But the biggest struggle that I had really was  I was having all these doubts about God and have I believed a lie?  Is this all bogus , and I never shared any of that sort of struggle or journey with my kids.

 They were all young at the time. My oldest was eight when this happened. So they were little, , but I continued to, , go through the motions even when I wasn't feeling it.  We still went to church. We still did family prayer time. I still read the Bible during our homeschool.

, I told them all the things that I had always believed, even though now I was kind of doubting them because way in the back of my mind, I was thinking I'm probably wrong on this. Probably what I'm feeling now is not [00:16:00] what is true. And I don't want to confuse my kids. They were so young that they didn't really deal with the grief aspect of it very much, , and again, they hadn't never seen their brother. , we had told them that I was pregnant and everything. So there was my daughter who was six at the time. She was the more sensitive one. . Not even right away, but a few months down the road she started kind of struggling and having some episodes of grief and mourning and just trying to process it.

She's very creative. So she would draw pictures of our family, you know, with Timothy and heaven and different things. I saved them all. I have all of her drawings. She was the only one where I really felt like I had to deal with her grief as well as mine. And I didn't know what to do cause , I'm not handling it.

Well, how am I supposed to help her handle her? So her Sunday school teacher at the time was just a really sweet lady and she just came alongside us and just loved both of us.  She was wonderful.  It wasn't anything particular that she did, but she just let us grieve and she loved us  and that was a real blessing.  That's just like [00:17:00] fresh rain falling on,  it's just, it's something that my thirsty soul needed.

So I can't even remember her name, but I really appreciate it. Yeah. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:17:10] So when did you start repairing your relationship with the Lord? 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:17:14] So I kinda went for five years with this untreated depression. We moved three more times. I had three more rainbow babies.  My husband was a squadron commander, , and that he was deployed.

I mean, life was just really busy and , I just kind of kept myself busy. I was a very good faker. , I thought, well, I'm supposed to be joyful, so I'll just pretend. Yeah. And I got so good at faking it, you know, even faked myself out I guess. When I first got on the medication, like a week later, I was playing with my daughter who's a toddler. And just all of a sudden this realization came to me.  I'm not faking it.  I actually feel playful. And that was a real revelation to me because I realized in that moment that I had been faking it, that I'd forgotten what it [00:18:00] was really like to even feel playful. And, you know, she was, I don't know, maybe 15 months old at the time.

So that was the moment when I realized how much I had missed by not getting help sooner. Yeah. I had been that way for her whole life and that really made me sad.  So it was about that five-year , when it got to that point of, okay, something's got to change.  After I told you that I went and spoke with my pastor and his wife, that was part of it, but I also then kind of re-engaged in my morning time with the Lord. I had really kind of pulled back just because I felt like he had abandoned me.

I felt Like he wasn't there for me anymore. And so I really just started to, I call it, I flipped my filter around and one of the chapters in my book is undefeated from trial to trimph, but  one of them is called believe anyway.  That was kind of the approach I took. I had been taking my experience in sifting the Bible through it and going, okay, this verse doesn't match up with how I feel [00:19:00] or what is happening to me.

But I flipped that around and I said, okay, I'm just gonna, I'm just going to believe the Bible is true. Like every word of it is true. Like all of this is true. And then I'm going to filter my experience through that. So instead of looking at my experience and going, God has abandoned me. God doesn't care about me.

God's angry at me. I took the Bible as the truth, and I said, okay, God loves me no matter what. And in light of that truth now, how do I look at my experience? And that made all the difference.  I really had to struggle through getting rid of a bunch of negative thought patterns that I had kind of collected over the years and hadn't really dealt with.

And it was kind of a revelation for me to say,  just because I have a thought a, it doesn't mean it's true. And B doesn't mean I have to keep it. Exactly. I can refute that. I can say, no, that's not true. God does love me. . So I've,  learned how to refute the lies by using God's word and the truth that are in there to say.

No, that's actually not true. This is true. And to re cage the way I was thinking. So [00:20:00] that quiet time in the morning really helped repair my relationship with God.  Changing how I thought about the Bible, really trying to study it and really trying to tease out, okay, where is God in suffering?

You know what I mean? Job's so many times.

Alexis Newlin: [00:20:13] Oh my gosh, that is a hard book to read. 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:20:16] It is, but I love the last few chapters , God shows up, but he doesn't answer a single one of Job's questions.. But at the end, you're just going, but God is so awesome. It's taking our focus off of our problems and putting our focus on God and saying he's bigger than the things I'm dealing with. And I came to the place where I decided that I didn't really want a God that I could understand. I want a God that I can trust, even when I don't understand. Because any God that's small enough for my little brain to comprehend. It's not a good God worthy of worship anyway. And so I've kind of learned to embrace and appreciate the mysteries of God.

You know, that's part of what makes him as infinite and awesome and amazing as he is. And to not be frustrated by [00:21:00] that.  I'm like a intellectual research study nerdy person. And so it frustrates me sometimes that I can't put the lines on the box that I want God to be in, you know, but he is a box busting God, and he doesn't stay in the boxes that we try to put him in.

So that's, that's been helpful to me to just say, , I'm not going to have all the answers and that's okay. I've decided that if I knew everything like God knows, and if I had as good and pure his intentions and motivations, as he did, I would choose the same thing he chose for me. But the reason why it seems confusing and hurtful to me is because I don't have all the facts and I don't have the pure motives.

And so that's why I get frustrated. But when I can just kind of think in those ways, that really helps me to deal with frustrating and painful things that I don't understand. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:21:51] I like that that's a good way to put that. , if I understood everything God did, and I don't want to worship that God. I like that. Cause  there's some things it's like, I have no idea and there's a , purpose. Like [00:22:00] you said later, , it felt like with you now with your story, being able to share it and to encourage other women who have gone through this. God has a purpose in everything in our pain and our triumphs and everything.

He can use everything. My friend says nothing is wasted and he uses absolutely everything that we go through. 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:22:16] Yeah, that's true. And that's what I really want to do is help people overcome adversity. And then, so we can go back to that hard time and, we can kind of mind that for what gems are hidden in there.

And I think a lot of times our greatest ministry to others comes out of our greatest pain.  God uses that just like you said, he doesn't waste anything. And I can't remember the verse, but it says , we share the comfort that he gave us , we comfort others with the comfort he gave us.

And, I just think , everything that we share with others is what he gave to us. Yeah.  that's what I'm trying to do with my writing and speaking, and message and everything, is just to help other people walk through that. Cause I felt really alone. I have these questions about God and I didn't know where a safe place was to ask them.

When I [00:23:00] finally got up the courage and talked to my pastor and his wife, they're like, Oh, it's cool. But in my mind, , I built it up like, Oh, this is a terrible thing to admit exactly.  So Isolated myself, which was totally unnecessary. So  I want to have a message to people into Christian to say, it's okay if you doubt, and if you struggle, if you have questions. God's a big boy, he can handle that. And you can not ask him any question he is not already heard. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:23:22] Exactly. He knows it all. I kinda think we forget that. We won't scare God with our questioning and our doubt. he welcomes it.  I'll answer you and show you the truth and show you, give you the answers. He wants us to ask. Yeah. 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:23:34] And I think I took all my questions and my doubts and I turned away from God. But what he wants is for us to take our questions and our doubts to him. And he wants to work through that with us, but I kinda, , just turn my back and turn my shoulders and hid my hurt. But  when we give things to him, there's nothing that he can't redeem.

No, we just have to let our grip loose. We have to give up our control and let him heal us. 

[00:24:00] Alexis Newlin: [00:24:00] That's sometimes the hard part is the control because we want to control everything, but you honestly, we have no control. I know 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:24:07] Control is an illusion.

Alexis Newlin: [00:24:09] It really is. And this year has definitely  made that  apparent.  because we've all kind of like lost control, but we thought it was normal and new and yeah, it's just a new normal now that we have no idea what will come next.

And that can be really, it can cause anxiety. It can cause those depressive feelings and yeah. 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:24:27] Yeah. I feel like this year  I've been able to weather the bumps a little better than I normally would have. And I think it's because of all this training that I've had over the past few years of dealing with anxiety and other ways that this one didn't really blindside me so bad. , earlier I just really got my feet swept out from underneath me spiritually. 

but now I have a deeper understanding, a deeper relationship with God where I'm not as easily knocked off my feet. I understand too that if I do get knocked down, you just get back up again. [00:25:00] So that's been, helpful in that, you know, as we weather one storm, it helps us for the next one.

Alexis Newlin: [00:25:05] Yeah.  after all this happened, when did you decide to turn this into more of a speaking ministry? 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:25:10] You know, everything's just kind of happened gradually and everything really honestly has just kind of been out of obedience to God. I wrote when I was writing the book and,  you have all these kinds of doubts when you try to do something for God, and then the devil starts whispering well who do  you think you are to do exactly.

 I remember so many times I was in tears going, who am I to write a book called undefeated when I feel so defeated every day? Yeah. But I think that's why God wanted me to write that book is because I can relate to that.

 , you know, we move around a lot because we're air force. So it was a previous church that we  had invited me to come be the keynote speaker for their retreat women's retreat about my book.  I delivered like four 45 minute talks on it. And that whole weekend was so amazing just to see God at work of how he brought these women together with all different kinds of pains and hurts and all [00:26:00] of these stories just intermingled.

There was one time. It was like the second or third talk that I gave. I was looking over my notes ahead of time. And I'm just like, something's missing. Like I just had this nagging feeling , there's something I need to say here. And it's, it's not coming to me. And I was kind of doing this frantic prayer of what is it, I'm missing. God. And I just kinda, you know, just sorta felt like it's okay, I've got it.  Just go and do what you have prepared. So I'm like, okay, , I'm not gonna stress about it. I'll do it. The pastor's wife had asked different people to give a testimony before each talk that we did. And so the woman who came up was talking about forgiveness and her relationship with her father, and some things. Just told this really compassionate, just heartfelt story and God's goodness and forgiveness.

And I was just like, That's it. That's what was missing was the element of forgiveness in the story. But I just think God is so cool because he didn't give me that piece of the puzzle. He gave it to somebody else, but we had to like come together and I dunno, just that whole weekend was stuff like [00:27:00] that.

And I just got really addicted to watching God work, like to get a front row seat, to see him working in people's hearts. And I was just like, I could really get used to doing this. Of course now everything's virtual. So I'm doing a lot of podcasts and sharing with people that way. So I don't get to interact with the people necessarily who are listening.

 that's kind of where that, that motivation and that heart came from. And again, like I said, just feeling like more people need to hear this because more people are suffering  and confused or hurt or anxious. There's hope and  and I just want people to know that.

Alexis Newlin: [00:27:31] Okay. What were some Bible verses that you would use to kind of help you  in the times of suffering and in the times of , trying to  get back to the lord? 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:27:41] Yeah. I'm not very good at remembering, like that's what I learned the verses part better, but the words,  but of course there's the obvious one about, don't worry about everything, but pray with Thanksgiving. And I developed like a whole sort of model of prayer based off the Lord's prayer, because I really struggled with [00:28:00] prayer of it being too gimme, gimme, gimme. Yeah, just this list, but when I follow the Lord's prayer and I just use each phrase as just kind of a model for a bigger thing.

I made a whole prayer guide and  there's a freebie for it on my website where you can just download the thing that I use every day. But that really helps me to do that instead of worrying to pray, to pray with Thanksgiving and like I said earlier, take my focus off .When I go, gimme, gimme, gimme my focus is on what I lack, but when I go through the Lord's prayer and it starts and ends with praise and, and I include Thanksgiving in there too,  my focus shifts to God. And I walk away going, I feel lighter, not because my burden is smaller, but because my God is bigger.

And so that, that whole element has really helped me. And and then the one about Renew your mind. Yes. And the one that kind of goes that's Romans 12 one, I think. And the one that kind of goes with that as in second Corinthians, [00:29:00] something or another 

Alexis Newlin: [00:29:00] Taking your thoughts captive? 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:29:02] Bingo, take your thoughts captive.

 That has really helped me because I have just had runaway thoughts, , and that's really what anxiety is. It's just your thoughts running all the muck and just going everywhere. And it's like, we got to get these inferences and kick some of them out. So those, those types of things have really helped me.

Alexis Newlin: [00:29:17] Okay. And so what is your podcast about now? Is it just basically you providing hope for people who are going through suffering.

Elizabeth Myers: [00:29:24] It's called resilient life hacks.  Sometimes it's just me, but more often than not, I have a guest who is on that's, , either an author or a podcast or, or whatever.

And they shared their story. Of,  how they overcame and what their challenges were and just kind of share with the audience, what they're resilient life hacks are. And I kind of have shortened it down to just spirit, soul, and body.  I asked them to speak on one of those three things.

I really feel like as.Christians in Western culture, we really tend to ignore the body as a physical thing, but they [00:30:00] really are integrated. And I didn't even really touch on that, that physical health and that self care part, getting enough sleep, eating better, actually exercising,  taking time to take care of my own body has been so helpful to me.

 The studies have shown that even exercising is better than any drug at fixing anxiety. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:30:19] Yeah. Cause it like releases endorphins. Yeah. It just helps so much. . 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:30:23] So I have people talk on one of those three subjects. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:30:28] So spirit, mind and body? Did I get them, right? 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:30:31] Yeah. So soul is really, it's the will the mind and the emotions, but they're all kind of intermixed.  And I think when people say the word soul,  we're not all thinking the same thing. So sometimes I use the word mind cause that's more what people are going to think of. So I switched back and forth between soul and mind.

Alexis Newlin: [00:30:50] Okay. Very cool. Yeah. So what are some other goals that you have for yourself for this year?

Elizabeth Myers: [00:30:57] Well right now, I'm trying to finish my [00:31:00] second book. The first one is kind of the worldview about who God is, you know, the nature of the battle that we're in. The premises that sometimes we feel defeated because we don't realize we're in a battle. And there is this it's not flesh and blood that we're battling against, but it's against the forces of darkness.

And so it's not the circumstances. It's not the people in our lives who are really our enemy. This is so important right now in an election year and all the other things going on, people are not our enemy. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:31:29] We are not, the enemy is our enemy. Like he 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:31:32] Exactly.

Alexis Newlin: [00:31:33] He's behind all of it. 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:31:35] He gets us distracted, fighting with each other, and then we're not fighting him. We're not resisting evil and that's when he can sneak in. And so that is super important. And I forgot where I was going with that. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:31:48] Oh your book. Oh, 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:31:50] Oh yes. So the first book is like knowing who God is, knowing who your real enemy is, and then knowing your identity in Christ and that you are a [00:32:00] beloved and that you are a warrior and that you're meant for victory.

Okay. So the second book I'm working on right now is undaunted your battle plan for victorious living. And it goes into those five areas that I described as your mind, your heart, will emotion, spirit. And body, I think I said heart and emotions. Those are actually one. And then I have a chapter on anxiety and a chapter on depression.

So right now I'm really hoofing it, trying to get that book finished because we're moving in a few months and I'm trying to get it done before we move. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:32:30] Where are you guys headed this time? 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:32:32] My husband is actually retiring after like 29 years in the service and we are going back to Texas. That's nice.

He's not really from anywhere. He moved all around, but my family is all in Texas, so we're moving out that way to be close to family again. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:32:48] That's really nice. And I want to jump back and get into spiritual warfare again with you. Can you explain that to people? Cause some people don't know that there is. They think it's people, [00:33:00] but it's not. So can you kind of go into spiritual warfare? 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:33:03] Yeah, I think the, like the biggest advantage that the devil the enemy has over sometimes is that we try to pretend like he doesn't exist. And even a lot of Christians will say, Oh no  he's not a real enemy.   Evil is just whatever bad things are in our heart or whatever. But there really is an actual battle going on around us and  really kind of you're on one side or the other. But I feel like , even as Christians, , the devil will try to come at us. They'll try to stop us from the things that God is calling us to.

Often , if we're trying to step out in something new or if we've just kind of done something like, , for instance, write in a book or starting a podcast, something like that. , a lot of times that will be kind of an attack that comes after that and just realizing this is not about whatever this issue is that I'm having. It's a bigger issue. That is so helpful to me. There's a part in the book where I talk about, [00:34:00] I call it, do the opposite. But sometimes,  life goes sideways and  I'm not sure what the right thing to do in a given situation is. And I think to myself, what would my enemy want me to do?

And then I do the opposite. So if I'm discouraged and like, I'm really wanting to give up, then I'm like, well, that's what my enemy would love for me to do. So I'm going to keep fighting.  If I'm feeling down about myself and I'm engaging in that negative, self-talk ,those tapes that play in your head,  I say, no, that's not who I am.

I'm not going to be discouraged by this. I'm going to be encouraged by the love that Christ has for me, that he loved me enough to die on the cross.  So I have a whole list of things in there, but that's kind of what spiritual battle on a daily basis looks like to me. Yeah. You know, it's nothing crazy or cosmic or weird.

It's just saying I'm not going to give in to what my enemy wants me to do. I'm going to resist. I'm going to push back and say, no, I'm not following what you want me to do. I'm following what Jesus wants me to do. Even if it [00:35:00] feels hard or you know, even if I'm struggling, even if there's obstacles, I'm still going to do that.

Cause that's in the end. That's what's going to lead to life. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:35:08] Yeah. Thank you for doing that. Cause people don't understand it or know. And they're like spiritual warfare , it's there.  And it seems to, I don't know for you, but for me it starts in my mind,  , and the Lord will be like, you're being attacked. I'm like, Oh.  I remember that.  I need to rebuke them . 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:35:23] , another thing that I like to say,  so you gotta be careful who you say this to, like my husband and I have this because we have the same mutual understanding, but I don't know that I would say it to anybody else, but  if we're having some sort of friction between us, , one of us will often say,  I have an enemy and it's not, you.

Like, you're not my enemy. This is not,  me versus him. This is about the devil trying to mess up our marriage because marriage honors Lord. And so seeing it from that perspective, then the two people can come to the same side. And resist the devil rather than fighting each other. And I, we just need a lot more of that [00:36:00] in our world.

Alexis Newlin: [00:36:00] Yeah. Cause right now I feel like our world is so divided. , if we were more United, I think there'd be a lot less stress, a lot less just anger, because I just feel like people are just splitting over every little thing instead of just trying to find common ground right now. And it's really painful.

Elizabeth Myers: [00:36:15] Yeah, it is. It is. Yeah. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:36:18] All right. And so my final question for you, when did you decide that you were brave? 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:36:25] For me it's just a daily decision to, to be brave. And I think the more I do it, the easier it gets. But even, , before everything that I described, I went to the air force Academy in college.

 Every day was some new challenge, some new things that I thought I couldn't do. And so I kind of learned there to push through. I learned that I can do more than I think I can do that. You can go further, you can go longer, you can do more. I don't know though how to listen to my body and know when to stop.

So they never taught me how to stop doing that. So I think it's just those little incremental brave [00:37:00] things. And I think sometimes I feel like. God kind of boxes me in a little bit where I would turn and run if I could, but he doesn't give me an out. So I'm just like, there's nowhere to go, but forward.  I might as well, we might as well do this even with anxiety.  I have had panic attacks and things, but I'm just like panicking isn't going to solve anything. It's not going to help., somewhere in there, there's still the rational part of my mind that exists. , this is not going to help. Yeah.

 I believe that really bravery and courage can only happen in the presence of fear.

 Yeah, you're right. 

If you have no fear then there's no need to be courageous. And sometimes, in certain situations, if you have no fear, then that's really just stupidity, not every race. That's true. So there's a fine line. And there was some times but I think bravery encourage is stepping up when it's scary, but you know God's with you, , just like David and Goliath.

Yeah. , you go, I'm just, I'm just [00:38:00] David. I just have a few rocks, but my God is bigger, and he can handle the giants ahead of me. And just again, focusing on him rather than my problems helps me be brave. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:38:10] I love that .This has been such a great conversation. I'm so glad I get to have it with you and talk. . Let everybody know the name of your books again, and then your podcast name so they can find you. 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:38:19] Yeah. So my first book is undefeated from child to triumph, how to stop fighting the wrong battles and start living victoriously. And the second one is undaunted. You're about a plan for victorious living, how to win at life by building a strong spirit, soul, and body.

Sorry, they're long titles, but . Yeah. So you can find more information on my website. It's Elizabeth, and then my podcast is resilient, life hacks, and it's on Apple, Spotify, wherever you listen to them. And there's also a Facebook page where I actually broadcast the video part of the podcast too.

So cool. Yeah. [00:39:00] So. It goes out every Wednesday afternoon. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:39:02] Okay. Very, very cool. Thank you so much, Elizabeth. And I will put all your info in the show notes so people can find you. 

Elizabeth Myers: [00:39:10] Okay, great. Thank you. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:39:11] Hey guys. Thanks again for tuning into today's episode. I just love being able to sit down with Elizabeth and all of the wisdom and knowledge that she gives on spiritual warfare. On depression and coping with it on coping with loss. It was such a blessing to be able to bring her interview to you guys. All her information will be in the show notes so you can find her catch her books, any ski speaking gigs or podcast episode she has. It's all there for you guys. 

All right. My three asks for. The episode. Ask number one of course is to subscribe. If you are loving what you're hearing and you want to get the episodes. A date early or be on the N in the know when they air. Subscribing is the best way to [00:40:00] do that. You can go to my website, Go to the contact us section. 

Put your email in there and then boom, you're on the email list. It's as easy as that. And you'll get a weekly email that lets you know of all the cool things that are going on the brave podcast. Secondly, share the episode with a friend. If you were hearing something today that you love, if you know another mom that's been through loss and feels like this episode is encourage them in that. Or if he knows someone who's dealt with depression and anxiety And you think this would help them go on and share that episode I would love it and it helps get the word out about the show and then finally ratings. We love ratings a five-star a one-star let me know  your thoughts. Definitely go on to itunes and leave a rating there i don't know how it works with spotify and the other ones but i know you can leave a rating on itunes or just shoot me an [00:41:00] email if you have suggestions of things you would love to hear or things you're wanting for the show. Again thank you guys so much. i am just so blessed that you guys spend Your wednesday Listening to me and the content that i am bringing to you guys. I so appreciate it So next month is february another brief bits is going to happen i think i'm going to share About my experience with the Tara dactyl not the actual animal but it was a ride in colorado it was another fear of conquered so i will share that with you guys Thank you guys for tuning in And i'll see you next week Bye.